The Fashion Magpie Weekend Vibes

Weekend Vibes, Edition No. 275: When to Press in Parenting.

*Image via World Architectural Design.

My Latest Snag: SuperGoop Glowscreen Restock.

I am at this point a die-hard devotee of Supergoop’s Glowscreen. I love the way it INVISIBLY evens out and amps up the glow of my skin (while offering sun protection). Earlier this month, I also tested It Cosmetics’ illuminating, SPF-packed, serum-infused cream, and I thought it was pretty solid (blends nicely, matched my skin tone well), but a much more full-coverage product than I had anticipated. Glowscreen feels like nothing on the skin; you notice the It Cosmetics. Sometimes I blend the two if I want a bit more coverage, especially in the evenings. Anyhow, I just bought a fresh tube of Glowscreen! Cannot recommend enough.

P.S. More early summer beauty finds and my latest batch of honest beauty reviews.

You’re Soooo Popular: Early Summer Finds.

The most popular items on Magpie this week:

bestselling summer fashion

RHUBARB AND ROSE SCENTED LIQUID HAND SOAP…MY FAVORITE SCENTED SOAP EVER

SET OF SIX HANDWOVEN RATTAN COASTERS — I USE THESE ON OUR COVERED PORCH!

RETRO-STYLE SHORT SLEEVE RACQUET CLUB GRAPHIC T-SHIRT

DOUBLE-SIDED PICNIC BLANKET WITH CARRYING STRAP

LONGLINE LIGHTWEIGHT BLACK BUTTON-UP…SUCH A CHIC BEACH COVER UP

STUNNING IRIDESCENT OYSTER-SHAPED ACRYLIC CLUTCH WITH DETACHABLE PEARL STRAP

DAINTY FOUR-LEAF CLOVER NECKLACE WITH GOLD HARDWARE…THIS UNDERSTATED PIECE IS GREAT FOR LAYERING

TWO-PIECE SWIMSUIT WITH HIGH RISE BOTTOMS AND ASYMMETRIC RUFFLE AT BUST IN BLACK

HIGH-WAISTED WIDE-LEG GREEN TROUSERS WITH A WHITE FLORAL PRINT

FRENCH FRAGRANT CERAMIC MEDALLION — ADD TO ANY DRAWER, CLOSET, ROOM FOR A SUBTLE LAVENDER AND CEDARWOOD SCENT (PLUS NATURAL MOTH REPELLENT)

SMOCKED NAVY MIDI DRESS WITH PUFF SLEEVES AND A THIGH-HIGH SLIT — PERSONALLY OWN AND LOVE THIS

CHIC HIGH-RISE BEIGE FLARED LINEN PANTS WITH PATCH POCKETS

SQUARE NECKLINE SLEEVELESS MIDI DRESS WITH TASTEFUL PLEATING FOR WAISTLINE DEFINITION — A GORGEOUS SUMMER STAPLE YOU CAN EASILY DRESS UP OR DOWN

LONG SLEEVE BREATHABLE CAFTAN WITH HANDBLOCKED PINEAPPLE PRINT — THIS BEACHSIDE HEAD-TURNER HAPPENS TO BE ON SALE TOO

WHITE COTTON-POPLIN BUTTON-FRONT SHIRT WITH STATEMENT FEATHERED CUFFS — SOLD OUT THE FIRST TIME RELEASED!

HIGH-RISE MEDIUM WASH JEANS WITH DRAMATIC WIDE LEG SILHOUETTE FROM GOOD AMERICAN

Weekend Musings: When to Press and When to Not.

One parenting quandary that appears to have long legs is when to press and when to not, especially on matters of manners and mood. That is – I remind my children about fourteen thousand times a day to say “please,” “thank you,” “may I…?” and sometimes I find myself at a point of desperation wanting to just let things slide. (Will it really matter if I don’t get a please out of them at 6:49 p.m. as I fetch one final cup of milk before bedtime?). On the mood front: my daughter is strong-willed, and will sometimes hurl herself into a funk over minuscule perceived injustices: “he got a little more frosting on his” or “but I wanted the blue cup!” I am consistently at a loss during these moments, especially when they are accompanied by wailing and whining. I have tried calmly explaining the situation. I have tried ignoring the comment. I have tried distraction. I have tried a firm correction. Each attempt seems only to fuel her frustration. The only tactic that has appeared to work is crouching by her side and hugging her through it, once she is willing to accept the embrace. But then what am I saying? Unconditional love, yes, but am I also condoning the outbursts? Am I somehow taking an easy way out by not aiming to sit there and work through the perceived unfairness in front of her? (Should I be reminding her that the color of a cup does not matter rather than hugging her to my chest?). I don’t know the answers to any of this, and so I can only lean on what feels natural and efficacious at this time.

As you might gather, we are in the midst of some very long days of parenting right now — we are without childcare for the week and have been juggling the children, our careers, and house guests. I think we are all boiling up and over a bit more frequently than usual, and I find myself particularly uncertain about how and when to press versus not.

How do you draw the lines?

Shopping Break.

+I have been hearing good things about Anya Hindmarch’s memoir — want to try next! For thriller-lovers, this one’s on my radar.

+I saw this dress an immediately imagined a date night at Bemelman’s Bar. Chic chic! This more colorful variation is also super fun. And their sweaters!!! I want them all — especially this.

+My friend Grace just launched a fun paper/stationery collaboration with Joy Creative Shop. I am currently sitting with this malachite-trim notepad on my desk next to me, and how great are these simple cards? Love the playful squiggle along the bottom.

+Also love these colorful personalized notepads — great gift. (More of my favorite stationery here!)

+Chic divided hyacinth bins — great for bathroom shelving, pantry, etc.

+Alice Walk just launched the greatest striped basics for summer – love this half-zip and you know how I feel about their tees (the best!)

+Knotted rope totes are trending this summer — love this J. Crew option, and the Longchamp one, too.

+Speaking of Longchamp, way back in my college years, I bought this expandable duffel and it is just brilliant for travel. I inevitably end up needing to expand with my new purchases!

+Grace and James is running a warehouse sale, with their adorable children’s clothing up to 80% off! My top picks here.

+Love this lip glow balm for summer — it glides on and just adds the tiniest hint of color.

+Up to 35% off Serena + Lily’s outdoor and beach finds — tempted by these beach chairs!

+Mille just added a bunch of great pieces to their sale collection. I am tempted by this versatile white blouse and this elegant striped dress (save for fall!)

+Chic, classic tennis dress.

+If you are prone to frizzy hair in the summer, I have heard great things about this product.

+Fun, LOUD shorts.

+People go wild for the On Cloudnova sneaks, and I have to say I like the colors of this pair.

+$10 statement earrings in a rainbow of colors.

+Fun wall mirror – imagine in a teen’s room.

+This stack of dramatic bangles would be a fun addition to my jewelry box.

+Saucy tiered cutout dress at a great price.

16 Comments

  1. Echoing what Judy said — when my stepkids were Emory’s age, we would often repeat the same phrase! It was definitely something they picked up at Pre-K and it was handy. Sometimes I’ll even remind them of it now although they’re in middle school! I agree with everyone who said that acknowledging the child’s feelings is key, but ultimately, so is sticking to your boundaries/rules. This will teach them that it’s not realistic to expect that they’ll always get exactly what they want. (Something we’re still working on with our 11-y-o, hah!) I’m certain that your unconditional love is felt at all times, as hard as it is to deal with the outbursts!

    xx

  2. Parenting really is the toughest job! I’m no expert, but this is what worked for us. It may seem rigid, but wanted my children to develop coping mechanisms. I’d acknowledge feelings, but not console. I’d respond by saying understand you are upset/feeling this way and need time. Go to your room until you feel better.

    On a shopping break note, I had ordered the Maison Monik brass shell pendant (in addition to the Tuckernuck shell pendant which is so adorable! Loving all the sea life this season!!) you featured a few weeks back. It sold out on Shopbop. Loved so much that I ordered directly from the Company in France. They were lovely and it is spectacular. I’m eyeing their You & Me drop earrings next! Thank you for introducing me to the brand!

    1. Thanks, Anne! I like that approach.

      I am SO glad you are loving these sealife-inspired pieces! So chic!!

      xx

  3. I think every child and every parent-child relationship is different, but I found that acknowledging my child’s frustration (however irrational) often immediately cools his temper. We will say something like, “oh you didn’t want that sandwich cut/blue cup/to leave the pool.” We don’t (almost ever) give in on the desire, but it seems to help when we first give name to whatever feeling he has about it. Even most adults occasionally find themselves upset or wanting something even when we know it’s irrational.

    1. I love this — my neighbor shared the same approach a few weeks back and it’s worked well for her boys, too. It makes sense to me — sometimes I just want to be “seen” as to how I feel! Hasn’t quite worked for Emory but it’s in the mix / toolbox.

      Thank you for sharing!

      xx

  4. I am dealing with the same struggles with my older son(almost 4). I think the most important thing (and hardest for me) is to remain calm. Like you said, the approach depends on your gut sense of what they need in that moment. I try to achieve a balance of comfort and discipline but I think as he gets older, I will have to err on the side of right/wrong and these are the consequences. All to say, there’s been a lot of breakdowns in our house right now(both him, his younger brother, and me!) ha

    1. Right there with you, Clementine! I agree that remaining calm is key but incredibly difficult, especially as the day/weekend goes on. And sometimes it’s not realistic to “tap out” or grab some time to myself to recharge. Ahh!

      Solidarity.

      xx

  5. We use ” You get what you get & you don’t throw a fit.” with kids in our family. It came from day care as it worked with a nephew who struggled with his perception of fairness.

    1. We say this too! It came from my daughter’s PreK teacher. it works really well.
      When confronted with demands like that I also just shrug and say “too bad! you get this one instead”. And if my daughter throws a fit (which she usually doesn’t, because I say it in such a way that it isn’t up for further discussion), she can go to her room or time out. Don’t leave room for debate or argument – you’re the parent.

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